What are you waiting for?

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Like most of us I have deferred doing many things in my life. I tell myself maybe it’s not the right time, not just yet. I tell myself maybe it is too risky or beyond my abilities. I tell myself that it is too expensive or I just don’t have time for it. Unfortunately I have lied to myself and time marches on with me no closer to my dreams.

I tell myself there is lots of time to do that which I long to do in the future. I have focused my thoughts and desires to be something I will attain in the future. My mind does not live in the present it only focuses on the future. I make investments in myself, in others, sometimes financially or physically so that I will have a better future, or so I think. The irony is, there really is no guarantee of the future. The future has yet to happen and it is a figment of my imagination.

Ask yourself is there something you want to do? Maybe you would like to write a book, travel somewhere, have a relationship with someone, start a business, purchase a new home, or find a way to give something back to the world.

What are you waiting for?

Still Waiting

With no guarantee of the future, all of this waiting for the right time to begin to live the life you want is simply wrong. You don’t know how much time you have left on this earth, so why wait? Here are some examples of deferring to the future:

  • I’ll start that business or buy that thing when I have more than enough money saved, maybe 4 or 5 years from now. Are you really going to wait 4 or 5 years for something you really want to do? Are there no other options?
  • I will stop that addiction (smoking, drinking, drugs, gambling) sometime in the future when the time is just right. Have you noticed the time is never quite right? Will you be better of deferring being free from your addictions?
  • I don’t have time to work on that book I always wanted to write. I have far to many responsibilities to attend to. If you had all the time in the world what other excuse would you use? Have you ever thought that you have never prioritized your writing over all the other bullshit you think needs to be done?
  • I really would like a better relationship with my significant other, children, siblings, parents, friends, but I’m too busy to call or spend time with them. Do you really want to go to your grave not being present for the people you love?

These are yet a few examples from my own life that plague me; I’m sure you can come up with your own list.

Quit imagining that you have all the time in the world to do the things you want to do, because you don’t. Make at least some effort to prioritize what is important to you and do it. If that means you have to be a little selfish then so be it. Look at your habits and decide do I really need to sit there every night and watch 2 hours of television.

Decide right now that the future is an illusion; begin living in the present and start doing the things you want to do and I mean now!

Stop taking for granted all the wonderful things that are happening around you understanding that tomorrow they become a thing of the past. You cannot wait for something to happen to experience fulfillment, happiness, and joy in your life; decide that the time is now.

happiness-is-now

These things that you want to do or have, may or may not bring great satisfaction to your life, but by deferring them off to some future time you may never know.

As human beings we attempt to live our lives in the past, present, and future. We often work in soul crushing jobs so that we can enjoy two or three weeks off. Are you actually working yourself to death for a couple weeks off? You can have more than that, you were not created to defer your dreams.

It’s fine to think about what you want to become or have, but don’t stop by just dreaming about it; you must act and you must live in the now.

Namaste

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Deferring Happiness

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I’ve written about various ways to foster more happiness in your life including yoga, meditation, expressing gratitude, and caring for your physical health. All of these things are wonderful ways to be more happy, but we still are not as happy as we could be. Most of us are trapped in thinking that happiness is something we defer until we retire, buy that new house, find a better job, create our own business, have a more fulfilling relationship with our significant other, or any other number of things we feel will make us happy.

Unfortunately this deferring of happiness based on some future event is robbing us of it in the present. I’m not advocating that you abandon your dreams or stop pursuing your goals, but thinking that these things will make you happier is a fallacy. Don’t let the things you want in the future delay the opportunity to be happy today. Each moment that you impose these walls around yourself that are blocking you from being happy in the now are time wasted. That expensive new car, home, or pile of money will only provide temporary happiness; find a way to enjoy today for that is all you are guaranteed. No one is assured of tomorrow, no matter what your age or health. How many years will you have wasted waiting for happiness? If I only had more money, a better job, a more attractive spouse, a bigger house, I could be truly happy. This self deception is stealing away the days, leaving you less available to those around you. Pursue your goals, but make it your purpose to be happy during the journey not the manifestation of these things.

“If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.”
― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Hear

Namaste

Right Mindfulness

The seventh step on the Eightfold Path is Right Mindfulness. Right Mindfulness is about being aware of the world around you and focusing on the present. For most of us this is very difficult to do, as we are always obsessing over what happened yesterday or what we need to do tomorrow.

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Through Right Mindfulness we are looking to create a greater awareness of everything around us, not hiding from it, but fully absorbing it. We are seeking to understand our true nature by being fully aware. Right Mindfulness then also implies focus and concentration. Maybe you have found this through playing an instrument, writing, or playing sports. This was a time when you were totally focused on one thing, in the zone if you will. The question for us is are there ways we can cultivate Right Mindfulness? Let me give you a few examples of simple ways that at least might set the stage for it:

  • When you go to a meeting leave your phone at your desk.
  • When you are talking with someone, stop and listen to them instead of formulating what you want to say next.
  • If you are reading at home turn off the television.
  • Turn your phone to silent mode, and stop looking at it every 5 minutes.
  • Turn off email notifications.
  • Go take a walk and use your eyes and ears.
  • Stop worrying about the future, it will soon be here, and worrying is pointless.
  • Seek out a hobby or activity that requires concentration as this will help  you focus on the present.

If you like to worry about the future, remember there is no better preparation for the future than to be completely focused on the present. Great things are accomplished now, not yesterday, or tomorrow.

Right Mindfulness can lead to an uncluttered mind and this sets the stage for the ability to focus on the present. In my next post I will write about Right Concentration.

Namaste

 

It’s a choice – Part 3

I know that in “It’s a choice – Part 2” I mentioned that this post would be about how nutrition contributes to making positive choices, but on further reflection I decided that it is not only obvious, but it is something you can research on your own. I don’t want to insult your intelligence with some rant regarding the virtues of veganism or admonishing simple sugars from you diet. You know what you should be doing, so just do it; remember the saying garbage in, garbage out. It’s not that I won’t write about nutrition, it is is just that there are other things that need to be said regarding choosing a positive path that are maybe less obvious than nutrition.

In “It’s a choice – Part 2” I mentioned that to set the stage for positive outcomes you must prepare yourself with supporting practices such as yoga, walking, or running in the morning, followed by meditation and affirmations. While I am resolute in my support of these practices, I can tell you that they only provide the environment where positive thoughts can grow. Yoga, walking, running, meditation and affirmations are analogous to tilling and watering the soil so crops can grow, but without an adequate amount of sunshine there will be no harvest. This post is about the other factors, that must come into play so that you can reap the harvest of a positive attitude and approach towards your life.

Let’s look at three things you can and must do to make that positive choice in your life on a daily basis.

  1. Cultivating Self Awareness
  2. Living in the present
  3. Being Grateful

Cultivating self awareness should be near the top of your list because without it you will find making daily corrections nearly impossible. If you can have enough awareness to know that a negative stimuli is about to create a negative response you are in a pretty good position to choose a different response. Self awareness allows you to realize when you are starting to go of course and make a correction, otherwise you are likely to continue down whatever negative path you started to go down. These paths might be anger, resentment, a feeling of superiority, or some other negative behavior. Just don’t let self awareness result in some form of self incrimination or guilt. Know that being self aware is a big step in changing or at least minimizing negative behavior, for without it you are just a member of the large group of reacting beings and you know what that often results in.

I’ve written about living in the present in the past, but the importance of it can never be stressed enough. True focus is always in the present and the present is also where happiness exists, certainly not in looking back, and not in the future. There is a quote I really like by Esther Hicks:

“Your life is right now! It’s not later! It’s not in the time of retirement. It’s not when the lover gets here. It’s not when you’ve moved into the new house. It’s not when you get the better job. Your life is right now. It will always be right now. You might at as well decide to start enjoying your life right now, because it’s not ever going to get better than right now-until it gets better right now!”

I think this quote says it better than I could ever say it. Live in the present if you can and you will have become one of the few that understands the absolute power in doing so.

If you struggle with finding ways to appreciate your life, you are probably missing the feeling of being grateful. You will note I didn’t say trying to be grateful, but really feeling grateful or blessed for what you have. If you cannot find a way to feel grateful for what you have you will always be in a state of wanting. People who live their life appreciating what they have will be much happier than  those that are always unsatisfied and wanting more. There are a number of ways you might do this, like daily journals, or going over a list of things you are grateful for, but whatever method you choose it must be a daily occurrence or the mind will wander into the future and your ego will get the best of you. I like to review the 10 or 15 things I am grateful for both big and small things after I am done meditating; this seems to ground me for the day. Another way to feel grateful is to simply look around you, and observe those in the world that have so little; you don’t need to look far.

Finally it is the person that performs these things everyday that reaps the true benefit. I find myself that when I miss my meditation session, which then causes me to miss saying my affirmations and thinking about what I am grateful for, the rest of my day is almost always less satisfying, more stressful, and not a lot of fun. This preparation of your body and mind each days is essential to obtaining the right frame of mind to make positive behavioral choices. I get up at 4:30 a.m. each day and by 5:30 a.m. I am out the door for a run/walk or on my yoga mat, back by 6:00 a.m. to meditate and wrap it up with some affirmations and making sure I am grateful. This might seem extreme, but it is this kind of preparation that gives me the energy and a positive attitude to deal with all the work day challenges.

Try this for a couple of weeks and you will begin to reap the rewards.

Namaste

 

 

 

Your life is right now!

I have this app on my phone that you get inspirational quotes from, and the other day I was checking it out in the morning like I normally do and the following came up:

“Your life is right now! It’s not later! It’s not in that time of retirement. It’s not when the lover gets here. It’s not when you’ve moved into the new house. It’s not when you get the better job. Your life is right now. It will always be right now. You might as well decide to start enjoying your life right now, because it’s not ever going to get better than right now-until it gets better right now!” Esther Hicks

I don’t normally make the focus of a post on a quote alone, but in this case I had to make an exception. For some reason reading this a couple days ago just seemed to resonate with me, as I have been struggling to stay focused in the present, often drifting into future mode. Future mode is a slippery slope and tends to lead to nothing but cycles of envision, want, plan and acquire, followed by another cycle of envision, want, plan and acquire. Oddly enough this reminds me of my job as a Project Manager, anyways it is no way to live your life.

Hope you enjoy this quote and take it to heart. Stay in the present my friend.

Namaste

Being present and productivity

Everyone seeks to be more productive and for some that means doing more of something.  For others it might be producing work that is higher quality, so there needs to be some definition around just what is productivity?

Live In the Present

Merriam Webster’s dictionary definition is: “the quality or state of being productive”, at Dictionary.com they define it as “the quality, state, or fact of being able to generate, create, enhance, or bring forth goods and services”. Either definition will suffice for my argument. I believe that living in the moment creates what others call flow or focus and this in turn can make one productive. The focus obtained from living in the moment allows you to create, generate, enhance, or bring forth goods and services, i.e. be productive. When are you really productive at home or work? I would guess it is when you are truly present and focused on what you are doing right now. Your mind is focused on what you are currently doing, not thoughts of the future, or some wandering down memory lane into the past. True productivity is for those people that can live in the moment, focus, and get into the flow.

Why are there so many articles written about managing your time and task management? They exist because we all have allowed ourselves to become so distracted by email, text messages, schedules, requests, that compete for our mind share right now, and the next 10, 20, 30, 60, or 90 minutes of our life. The living in the present mindset allows you to spend your time on what is important, which of course leads to greater productivity.  This is why I have spent so much time lately making a case for living in the moment, because I know we all want to contribute something to those around us and we also need to be productive for our own peace of mind. Stay in the moment, focused on the most important things and the rest will fall into place.

Namaste