I’ll use the term or phrase “lighten up” to mean stop taking life so serious. There is a common affliction in our society that everything we do is serious business. We are constantly measured by metrics and KPI’s to attain more each year, to work harder, to be driven, and my question is what does it get us? We sacrifice our health and well being for goals that someone else set for us and make ourselves miserable in the process. I’m going to be a bit blunt here and call out a lot of this serious obsession as bullshit. We are not on this earth to work ourselves into an early grave for the sake of corporate profits or any other obligation imposed by someone else for that matter.
Aside from all the destructive effects of the ultra serious demeanor that we have adopted; the real travesty is that we are sucking the joy right out of our life moment by precious moment. I used to attend a church where one of the parishioners worked for Pepsi corporation and had been working his way up the corporate ladder over the past decade moving his family with each promotion. Anyway I can recall how upset he was when someone brought a Coke product to the church picnic, and of course I thought this was pretty funny. I mean making sugar drinks that make people fat is pretty serious business after all. Now I’m not here to bash soft drink companies because I’m sure in their own weird way they contribute something to society other than obesity and diabetes. It is the serious nature of it all that drives me crazy. So much of what we do is just not serious by nature and we need to be able to distinguish from those things that are really serious in life and those things that we can give ourselves a pass on and relax a bit.
Taking yourself or your role in an organization so seriously either emanates from ego or an anxiety you have about delivering something for other people. Let’s get real with ourselves; isn’t it much more fun and productive when we lighten up a bit? Being serious doesn’t equate to great results. I would argue that great results come from a calm state of mind and even more so from a joyful and happy state of mind. Be goal oriented, care about results, but in doing so lighten up and have fun.
It is your right to have fun and you don’t need anyone’s permission except your own. I’m not saying give up on your goals and screw around all day, quite the opposite. I am saying that you need to stop being so serious and look for enjoyment, fulfillment, satisfaction, camaraderie, fun, challenge, calmness, and fun in everything you do. There are times to be serious, but 95% of the time focus on making life fun.
After suffering a fair amount of anguish and getting myself all worked up about things going on at home and at work I came to a simple realization that I was taking everything too seriously. The not so amusing thing about this is that it had been going on for some time now, maybe a couple of years. I look back and haven’t taken a vacation in almost 3 years, focused intensely on a number of goals, which I achieved, but all this even made me more focused. I also realized that not only did I skip vacations, I quit playing golf, and quit playing guitar. What was interesting is that these things were replaced with more study and physical fitness activities. The truth was I forgot how to have fun, or do something just for the hell of it.
Most of this stems from a kind of all in attitude, or taking things too far. So it is good to exercise on a daily basis, but when all your free time is devoted to it you become very one dimensional, and yes a bit too serious. So not only did I forget how to have fun, but I myself was boring everyone else to death. While it is always nice to move in a new direction, sometimes you abandon things you really love. I blame myself for this all or nothing approach, and all to serious attitude. So another side affect is that you become judgmental, because everyone else doesn’t share your enthusiasm for blogging, Buddhism, meditation, or yoga. Becoming too focused also narrows the acceptable things you are willing to experience because they can’t possibly compete with your path to enlightenment.
- The world did not come to an end when I skipped my yoga practice yesterday
- Enjoying what you are doing at work will not cause you great harm
- Instead of rushing off to meditate or exercise, it is perfectly acceptable to show some interest in others first
- While it might take a bit longer to learn something dictated by your quest, you are probably a better person for being less inwardly focused
- You don’t have to be 100% dedicated to something to make progress, meaning you don’t need to quit doing everything else that made you happy to pursue a goal
- As much as it pains me it is not necessary to accomplish everything on your list, especially on a weekend
- I have been taking everything way to seriously, from my exercise routines, to my Buddhism studies, and my elimination of vices
All this seriousness and laser focus only made me more judgmental which resulted in anger and resentment instead of understanding and compassion. I couldn’t live with the fact that I was flawed and had weaknesses, and maybe even liked some of the things the common man or woman did. So I vow to lighten up a bit, have a beer, skip a few workouts from time to time, and maybe try to enjoy things a little more, and yes become less serious.
Have a great weekend!