Tag: change

Forgive Yourself

There are many philosophies and religions where the practice of forgiveness is extremely important. We are taught to forgive others for their sins against us, errors in judgment, or even crimes they have committed, but are we equally forgiving of ourselves?

If you are an egomaniac you wouldn’t feel bad about what you have done in the past and forgiveness would not even be a consideration. Fortunately for you, there is an awareness of how you fucked up, and you feel bad. Maybe what you did just hurt yourself, but most likely it also affected others and you are experiencing a guilt trip. You become angry with yourself, condemning yourself for being so stupid. All this guilt and anger does nothing for your current state of mind and prevents you from apologizing to yourself and others. It may be something where you physically harmed yourself or someone else, and a certain amount of guilt is warranted because as I said before you are not an egomaniac, you have some sense of empathy at least for others. It may be that you just can’t forgive yourself for the unsavory shit you did, but nothing will change if you continue to be weighed down by this guilt.

Here is the thing we are all just humans, well most of us anyway, and we are flawed as hell. There are two courses of action for you at this point:

  1. Stop doing the shit that is making you guilty. This could be some destructive habit or behavior, but you need to stop doing it. There will be some relief coming your way as you have quit doing the stupid thing that makes you feel guilty.
  2. Forgive yourself and move on. Every one of us has messed up our lives in various ways and it is very easy to keep blaming ourselves or worse yet someone else. Walk away from it, that shit you did that is tearing you apart is now in your past; bury it!

 

Many of us have an uncanny ability to forgive others, but when it comes to ourself we just can’t seem to be as gracious. You are terrorizing you, and can’t seem to come to grips with the imperfect version of you.

Let go of the guilt trip and walk away!

 

Namaste


This post was proofread by Grammarly.

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All the little things matter

Take some time today to analyze all the things you do today. What is your routine comprised of? We tend to think I need to make a massive change, quit my job, and move to Bali where I will be a writer and contemplate the various sunrises or sunsets. I contend you don’t need to make a massive change in your life for you to fulfill your dreams, but instead you need to start making sure those daily habits become a contributor and not a detractor to the life you envision.

You have all of these little habits each day that you perform that dictate your results, so this is a good place to start. Let’s say you want to be a writer, artist, or entrepreneur. What activities are you doing that contribute to this goal? If your habit is to get up late, dive in the shower, and drink three cups of coffee so you can make it to work at the last minute you are missing an opportunity to do something to contribute to the life you want to live. What if you just got up a couple hours early and worked on that thing you are passionate about? Well you would then spend 2 hours working towards your goal, or in aggregate 14 hours per week, or 728 hours a year. Could you accomplish something with 728 hours of effort, hell yes!

What if you wanted to become healthier, and instead of watching 3 hours of Netflix, Amazon Prime, or YouTube you spent an hour working out doing something good for your body. None of this shit a revolutionary change in your life or maybe for you it is, but the daily application of these new found habits accumulate over time and lead to massive results. Listen Rome wasn’t built in a day, and the success and satisfaction you seek won’t magically happen. You don’t need to destroy everything you have or do to improve, but you do need to make sure you have these supportive habits that occur on a frequent basis for you to start living the life you want for yourself.

Someone will always be selling you some new way to turn your life around, but all these ideas of reprogramming who you are usually don’t work. You have become what you were in the past, all these habits and ways of looking at life have been engrained over many years of just being you. Stop thinking you need to remake yourself, your not fucked up, but you are also not so locked into your past that you can’t start making changes. Don’t buy into this shit that you are broken and need to be re-built, you and I know there are a lot really great things that you are doing, and yes maybe somethings from your past that are holding you back from being an even better version of yourself.

Say it with me:

“Today I will make one small change that will contribute to the life I want to live”

Namaste


If you would like to support this blog, check out the awesome selection of eBooks at:

Mind, Body, Spirit books at eBooks.com

If eBooks aren’t your thing, check out my Resources page for additional ways to support this blog.

Visit my other blog Inspirational Book Reviews where I review some incredible literature.

This post was proofread by Grammarly.

But I Can’t

Random Thoughts / Poetry

But I Can’t

I catch myself complaining about things

Let it go

I expect things to turn out a certain way

Expect nothing

I will be happy when such and such happens

Be happy now

Everything is changing

Change yourself

I can’t do this

Yes you can

It’s too hard to do this shit

No, it isn’t

I’m too tired

Do it anyway

No more excuses

 

Namaste


This post was proofread by Grammarly.

 

Beginning To Evolve

Random Thoughts / Poetry

Beginning to Evolve

Up early again

It’s Monday and a new week begins

I feel like I am starting to evolve

There is a sense of meaning returning to my life

It has taken so many years for the changes to occur

It’s almost Darwinian

I am calm

I am resolute

The world hasn’t changed

I am changing

I am grateful to be alive

I am present

 

Namaste


This post was proofread by Grammarly.

 

The end of suffering

Random Thoughts / Poetry

The End Of Suffering

You know everything is impermanent

Yet you choose to suffer

Only change is certain

Yet you choose to suffer

You are aging day by day

Yet you choose to suffer

Life and death is ever-present

Yet you choose to suffer

Love and joy surround you

Yet you choose to suffer

You have no direction

You can find no end to suffering

The end to your suffering is a walk down the Eightfold Path

 

Namaste

 

If you would like to support this blog, check out the awesome selection of eBooks at:

Mind, Body, Spirit books at eBooks.com

If eBooks aren’t your thing, check out my Resources page for additional ways to support this blog.

Visit my other blog Inspirational Book Reviews where I review some incredible literature.

 

Book Review – The 5 Second Rule

Mel Robbins

As I’ve mentioned before my book reviews are not meant to be a comprehensive dissertation about the book. I prefer to provide the simple premise and my own perspective about the writing.

5 second rule

The premise behind this book is that we have a tendency to talk ourselves out of pursuing good ideas because our primary focus is on protecting ourselves from things that take us out of our comfort zone. Mel Robbins talks about a hack that breaks this pattern of fear or procrastination by counting backwards from 5 to 1 and then taking action. This breaks the pattern of letting our mind talk ourselves out of doing something in response to the idea we have.

Most of this book is about having the courage to pursue your dreams and explaining all the ways to overcome sabotaging yourself. Let me say that for me the book was very inspirational, and may for you act as a trigger to start pursuing your dreams. She includes lots of quotes from readers on how they changed their life, and some pretty cool quotes on pages you can rip out and put on the wall in your home office for instance.

As much as I enjoyed the book, listening to her on a podcast or YouTube is equally enjoyable. Mel is an excellent public speaker. The YouTube video below is a good example of her excellent presentation skills:

It is an easy read that you could accomplish in a weekend, a little over 200 pages. I would certainly recommend it if you are considering making some changes in your life and need a little push in the right direction.

Namaste

 

 

Easy ways for Creating Success

Often we think we need to make radical changes in our lives to create success, when in reality it is the little incremental changes that make the biggest difference. You don’t need to quit your job, abandon everything you know, or put your financial future at risk; you just need to start making changes in your behavior one step at a time.

success is the sum of small efforts repeated

What is Success?

When I talk about success I’m not limiting it to financial gain, but that will certainly be one measure. You might also define success in terms or relationships, health, skills, or peace of mind just to name a few. Another way to look at success is personal growth. Successful people are people that are always growing. Personal growth provides satisfaction and happiness, which ignites a need for more growth. Face it if you are not growing as an individual you are standing still and nothing changes.

Jim Rohn 1

Ways to be more successful

Think of how much you could achieve if each month you made one little change in your behavior. Each time you made one of these seemingly insignificant changes they would begin to propel you towards achieving your goals. One of the reasons you will achieve your goals is that you are building self discipline with each change. Let’s take a look look at some examples:

Health

  • I get up an hour earlier to perform my yoga practice
  • I quit eating foods that contain high amounts of sugar
  • I begin eating more fruits and vegetables
  • I quit drinking alcoholic beverages (OK not such a small thing)
  • I start going to the health club and began lifting weights

Skills

  • I begin studying for a certification related to my job
  • I take a class on something I’m interested in
  • I learned to play a musical instrument
  • I read one new book a month on a topic that will change the way I think

Peace of mind

  • I quit watching the news on TV
  • I meditate for 10 – 15 minutes every day
  • I start watching motivational videos on YouTube (Jim Rohn, Tony Robbins, Les Brown, Eric Thomas, Esther Hicks, Wayne Dyer, or Mel Robbins)
  • I started a blog to write about something I am interested in, not for other people but for myself

Mel Robbins 2

Don’t limit yourself

While I mentioned you can chose one thing each month to change, there is really no limit. Let’s take watching the news in the morning. What a horrific way to start your day. You are feeding your mind politics, tragedy, pain, suffering, and tons of negative things and getting little in return. So instead of watching the news, roll out your yoga mat, and while doing your routine listen to or watch something inspirational on YouTube. Now you have accomplished three things in the same amount of time and do this every day and your whole life begins to change.

We improve by making changes, some small, some bigger, but by changing. As we make these changes we are creating self discipline and it is this very fact that will lead us to great success however you define it.

Choose that one thing today that will move you forward.

Namaste

 

 

 

Update on the Monday Challenge

I’ve posted a couple different times on how Monday is the ideal day to set a goal that you will work towards or maybe achieve depending of course on the nature of what you are seeking. My own score card is I have completed two of the three goals I set for myself. Instead of taking my own advice I set goals that were very difficult so 2 out of 3 is not so bad, and I have made some progress on the one that I cannot say I have completely mastered. This brings up another point about goal setting that we need to understand. It is vitally important that you set the goals so that you can begin to change your behavior, but realistically you will not always achieve them in the time frame you set for yourself. I’ve always liked the graphic below because it does a good job of simply depicting what really happens when we set a goal and work toward achieving it.

success looks like

Sometimes reaching your goals and the resulting success this brings you is a messy process, so I wanted to make sure you cut yourself some slack during this whole process. I found myself questioning the order of goals I set for the 4 or 5 weeks, re-ordering them, and even eliminating some to better suite my true desires when it comes to work and my personal life. I’m sure you will do the same as you make adjustments as you think about what you really want to achieve. While it is true that we will all struggle to achieve our goals, it is no reason to hesitate to move forward. The very fact that you may find the goals you set difficult to achieve means that you have set worthy goals. Continue to have faith in yourself and your dreams. Don’t fall back into old patterns of behavior as every Monday brings with it a new start, a new goal, and change.

Namaste